Internal Family Systems

Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a therapeutic approach based on the idea that we all have different parts of ourselves, each with their own beliefs, emotions, needs, bodily sensations and ways of responding. We talk about parts quite naturally in normal conversation, e.g. “there’s a part of me that wants to go for a run and there’s another part that wants to crawl under a blanket and watch TV”. All of our parts are well-intentioned but they may take on extreme or unwanted roles as a result of difficult life experiences in order to protect us from further harm. For example, a part might learn to stay constantly alert to danger, avoid situations that feel unsafe, keep people at a distance, or work overly hard to make sure that everything is under control. Although these responses may have been helpful at one point in our lives, they can sometimes become less helpful as circumstances change. Parts can become polarised, leading to inner conflict.

At the core of IFS is the concept of Self – who we are beyond our parts and the essence of our true nature. From Self we can approach our parts with qualities such as compassion, calmness, curiosity, and clarity, allowing proactive and reactive parts to soften. With access to Self Energy we can develop a greater awareness of our different parts and understanding what they may be trying to communicate or protect us from. Over time, this can help us respond to ourselves with greater compassion and flexibility, rather than feeling overwhelmed or controlled by particular thoughts, emotions or patterns.

Integrating IFS with EMDR

I tend to integrate IFS with EMDR where appropriate. IFS helps us to understand our inner system while EMDR helps to resolve specific traumatic memories. IFS can help us to understand potential blocks or barriers to EMDR processing, for example there may be a part that feels frightened about approaching a painful memory, while another part is desperate to move on. Taking time to understand and work with these different responses can help create a greater sense of safety and readiness before beginning EMDR processing.